Actual suicide notes, such as:

I could wish that I had, for my goodby kiss, a .38 police special with which I have made some good scores — not records but at least made my mark. Instead, I have this black bitch — bitch, if the word is not familiar to you — but at least an honest one who will mean what she says.

The neighbors may think it’s a motor backfire ,but to me she will whisper — "Rest – Sleep."

Albert

P.S. I think there is enough insurance to see Valerie through school, but if there isn’t — I am sure you would out of the insurance payments, at least —

I hope further and I don’t insist that you have the ordinary decency — decency that is — to do so — Will you see Valerie through college — she is the only one about whom I am concerned as this .38 whispers in my ear.

ALSO NOT FUNNY RELATED STORY:  A blogger writes about getting shot at while at his computer….