Reality Check With Grant Swank

Ken AshfordElection 2008, Right Wing Punditry/IdiocyLeave a Comment

The Reverand Pastor Grant Swank had a great column yesterday.  A totally incomprehensible column full of ten dollar words….

Obama’s Cult

"’As you may know, not long ago a couple hundred thousand Berliners made a lot of noise for my opponent. I’ll take the roar of 50,000 Harleys any day,’ McCain said, referring to Democrat Barack Obama’s recent visit to the German capital" per AP.

John McCain was addressing the Sturgis Motorcycle Rally. His speech was reality-based, far different than the fantasy-celebrity-Islamic B. Hussein Obama base.

Obama’s base is full of fantasy-celebrity Islamics?  What is that?  Like Sacha Baron Cohen’s Borat?  No, was he Islamic?

Reality. It’s becoming increasinly a strange virtue.

And Milk.  It’s not just for breakfast anymore.

Yet it is the power behind reality that guarantees its ultimate success with those genuinely seeking truth.

Yeah, I don’t know what that means either.  I guess reality runs on those batteries used by Energizer bunnies.

Cultures have been easily steared by the unreal. It does not take thought or perception to go that route. When cultures persist in that journey, they disintegrate.

Unreal?  You mean like an unseen God who sits on a throne up in the clouds, which you can visit after you die because he’s got your name scrolled in a book, and you can play with all your longlost dead pets?

Reality means sacrificing one’s own wishes for what is.

And virtual reality means sacrificing some of one’s own wishes for what is.  I think.

Reality dictates that self submit to the actual milieu rather than carve out a more convenient travel.

In other words, traveolocity.com is a ripoff.

Cults are built on fantasies. They wrap into their warp the thoughtless and weak. If reality tries to break through, there is unbelievable resistance for cults are structured on the extreme opposite of reality.

I need graphics to help me understand this.

There is a B. Hussein cult already formed. It is given to the craze. Its members don’t read, don’t heed. They simply cheer, stomp, cry, fall at their messiah’s feet and clamor for more. B. Hussein is most adept at providing them with the unreal.

Well, since more than half of polled Americans favor Obama, can it really be called a cult?

"Change." "Unite." Phrases like that don’t actually say anything when coming from a manipulative, controlling personage like B. Hussein.

Riiiiiight.  And calling him "B. Hussein", by the way, isn’t at all being manipulative.  Because in reality, that’s his name, right?

When McCain spoke to the bikers, he was more than in his element.

Yes, because McCain owns six houses, flies his own private jet, etc.  He’s a real Hell Angel, that John McCain.  Especially when he offered up his wife to appear in a topless beuaty pageant.

They would not tolerate for a second the contrived. McCain gave them reality. He spoke simply the facts. He became one of them.

He’s even getting a tat on his ass.

There were no suspicions. There was no hesitancy, no heckling, no madness.

Probably because most of them were getting a beer before the main attraction, Kid Rock, took the stage (it’s true!)

Interestingly and importantly, Cindy McCain brought about the same chemistry when taking the microphone. While quite the wealthy female, she stayed with the reality quotient and matched her audience in splendor.

Ah, yes.  The splendor of hundreds of drunk bikers in the summer heat, knocking back the beers and talking about their Harleys.  It’s kind of like an F. Scott Fitzgerald novel.

If America wants to remain on track, it must keep to the reality gear.

Not second or third gear, but the reality gear.

If America concludes to lose its way, it chooses the likes of B. Hussein. His cadre is already in place to usher in the throes of division and depression. That is what "Change" and "Unite" really mean in the B. Hussein lexicon.

Swank has obtained the secret B. Hussein decoder ring.

McCain’s reality is at America’s core.

With Stanley Tucci and Angeline Jolie.

It is what America has always held to when at the Republic’s best. It is what makes this democracy like none other, no matter the detractors’ derisions.

McCain’s reality speech to the bikers was clear and crisp. It was honorable because it was honest. Reality knows nothing but honesty.

True.  I especially like the "honest" part where McCain mocked Obama for suggesting that we can improve energy efficiency by keeping our tires inflated…. and then later (outside the rally) said he agreed with Obama about that.

It’s that kind of reality and honesty which is rare these days.

That is why the B. Hussein’s doctrine is the Loser Maximum.

Which sounds like a badly named power drink.

It is dishonest on so many multi-dimensional levels as to be frightening to the real-thinking citizens of this country.

Well, maybe not as dishonest as constantly mis-stating his name, huh>

B. Hussein has belonged to a dishonest political plant known as Jeremiah Wright’s church. B. Hussein has tied up with dishonest Muslims in Illinois via the Nation of Islam. B. Hussein’s biography is fraught with untruths. His birth certificate is dishonest — a fake. And so forth and so forth.

That’s all honest reality, my friends.  It’s honest.  And so forth and so forth.

The decision before this nation is to empower reality from Atlantic to Pacific or wed to the death wish. It is that stark a choice.

For real, Pastor Swank?  If we vote for Obama, we die?  C’mon.  Reeeeeally?