Yesterday was Movie-A-Minute; today is Book-A-Minute.  Some examples:

A CHRISTMAS CAROL

Bah, humbug. You’ll work thirty-eight hours on Christmas Day, keep the heat at five degrees, and like it.

Ebenezer Scrooge, three ghosts of Christmas will come and tell you you’re mean.

You’re mean.

At last, I have seen the light. Let’s dance in the streets. Have some money.

TAMING OF THE SHREW

Spit. Hiss.

Shut your mouth before I hit you.

I can be civilized now that a man has bossed me around. I love you madly, Petruchio.

CHARLIE AND THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY

(Charlie gets a TON of Willy Wonka chocolate bars.)

Hooray. I’m an instant winner.

Hi kids. Four of you will undergo severe physiological distress that in the real world would get me sued, and one will be picked to be the Special One.

(Charlie gets picked.)

ENCYCLOPEDIA BROWN

Alas. Something is wrong.

Never fear. I will solve the mystery by employing my repertoire of obscure facts as a thinly disguised device for teaching kids educational information.

(He does.)