Jan LaRue of the right-wing Concerned Women For America writes an article with the inquisitive headline: When Will Bisexuals Drag Homosexuals out of Polygamy Closet?

I had to read that headline several times in order to get my head around it.  I get the homosexual/closet reference — that’s obvious.  But where does the polygamy thing come in?  Is Ms. LaRue suggesting that homosexuals are for polygamy, or against it?  And regardless of their position, why are they in the closet over it? 

And why will bisexuals (who, apparently are not in the LaRue’s metaphorical closet) drag those homosexuals out?

I tried wading through the article and — as far as I can tell — Ms. LaRue is making a slippery slope argument.  It goes something like this: if gays are allowed to marry, then the bisexuals will be jealous and they’ll want to marry, too.  But, being bisexual, the bisexuals will want to marry one of each gender, creating legalized polygamy.  Or as Ms. LaRue puts it:

If polygamy isn’t legalized, how will a bisexual marry just one person without denying his or her "bisexual orientation"? Otherwise, in order to marry, won’t bisexuals have to make a gender choice in a spouse and then engage in adultery in order to fulfill who they are as bisexuals?

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How long will bisexuals accept less than "equal treatment" while homosexuals continue to diss civil unions and push for the right to "marry" in other states? Who thinks bisexuals don’t want the same "legitimacy," "acceptance" and "affirmation" for bisexual behavior that legalized polygamy will provide? How long will they wait for their homosexual "allies" to help them achieve the equal right to "marry" the persons of their choice?

I worry about the person who worries about such things.

But mostly, I have to laugh at the idea of Jan LaRue penning an article saying that gay marriage is bad because it discriminates against those poor, poor bisexuals.  Like she cares.