Kaye Grogan (pictured here) is just plain sassy and scary.  A regular columnist for Alan Keye’s Renew America website, her opinion pieces are routinely and savagely lampooned at World O’Crap and Sadly, No.  Although, to be frank, her opinion pieces hardly need any satirization — they are unintentionally hysterical to begin with.

Take this recent column of Grogan’s on the death penalty.  In it, we find this little gem of a paragraph:

Innocent victims that were murdered — deserve to have their self-defense carried out by the states. Then and only then . . . will justice prevail.

Oh, I just love Kaye when she writes like this.  But someone should tell her:

(1)  It is too late for dead people to engage in self-defense.

(2)  Even then, when the state carries out self-defense on behalf of murder victims, it is not self-defense.  You see how that works, hun?

And the paragraph before is a little gem too:

If the death penalty is not a deterrent to potential murderers . . . think how much less a deterrent it will be — to not have the death penalty in place period.

I think my head (as well as the head of every English teacher) is going to explode.