Innovation Of The Year

Ken AshfordEnvironment & Global Warming & Energy, Science & TechnologyLeave a Comment

CellfoilhpPopular Science magazine has annouced it’s "Innovation Of The Year" and it really is something to get psyched about.

We all know what solar panels are and what they do.  But the problem with solar panels is two-fold: (1) they are big and bulky; and (2) they require buttloads of silicon to manufacture and silicon is expensive.

These factors make for expensive solar panels.  Solar panels cost about $3 for every watt of energy they produce.  Coal, on the other hand, costs $1 per watt of energy.  So if the idea is to save money, solar is not the way to go.

Until now.

The "Innovation of the Year" is something called Powersheet solar cells.  Rather than a bulky panel, it is a thin sheet about five times the width of aluminum foil.  It does the work of a solar panel.  Without silicon.

Essentially, it comes off a rolling press, and best of all, it costs around thirty cents per watt of energy produced.  That’s ten times cheaper than solar panels, and three times more efficient than coal and gas.  And being a sheet rather than a panel, it is flexible and can go on any type of roof.

And, of course, it is "green".

This is not something that we’ll see fifty years from now.  This is a product which is ready to roll out NOW. 

Read more here.

About Your Outgoing Message

Ken AshfordRandom MusingsLeave a Comment

  1. Don’t tell me you’re not home and/or unavailable.  I’ve already figured that out.  My keen powers of deduction enable me to distinguish between a recording of you and… you know, you.  Also, when you say you’re "unavailable", I take that to mean you are either on the toilet or having sex.  And maybe I don’t want that mental image, thank you very much.  But most of all,  I’m not sure I believe you when you say you’re "not home" or "unavailable".  You could be screening.  You know you do it, and I know you do it.  So let’s stop the lies.
  2. Don’t tell me that I have "reached [your] answering machine".  No shit, Sherlock (see #1).
  3. Don’t tell me to leave a message after the beep.  Just as you may or may not be home, I may or may not want to leave a message.  So what’s good for the goose is good for the gander — I’ll leave a message if I want to (you’re not the boss of me!).  And by the way?  If I do want to leave a message, I don’t need instructions.  Answering machines have been around for a while — did you seriously think I was going to start talking in the middle of your outgoing message?
  4. Don’t tell me "you know what to do (at the beep)".  That’s so late 1980’s.  And it wasn’t amusing then.
  5. Don’t be funny.  Chances are, you can’t do a worthwhile comedy shtick in under 10 seconds.  And even assuming that you have a funny message, it’s not going to be funny the second, third, or fourth time.  In fact, it will just become increasingly annoying.  Oh, and if you do that lame "Hello?  [pause]  Hey! How are you?  [pause] Hahaha.  Just kidding.  I’m not really here" bit, then I’m never calling you again.  Ever.
  6. Don’t tell me you’ll get back to me as soon as you can.  We all know this is a lie when we say it, so we all know it’s a lie when we hear it.  And that’s fine.  I understand you’re busy.  So am I.  You’ll get back to when you feel like it, if you feel like it.  That’s totally cool — it’s understood as part of the social contract.  So don’t lie about it.
  7. Don’t mention your pets as being unavailable to take my call.  Guess what?  I wasn’t calling to speak to them anyways.  You know why not?  Because they’re animals.  They can’t talk.
  8. I don’t want to hear your baby gurgle and googoo.   Maybe if I reach you instead of the answering machine, and if the baby is up and in a good mood, I’ll indulge the aw-cute gabba-gabba.  But not on your machine, okay?
  9. Nor do I want to hear Stephen Hawking.  Look, I’ve just made it easy for you by suggesting certain things you can omit from your outgoing message.  The very least you can do is have your outgoing message be in your own voice.
  10. But just one of you is fine.  I don’t need to hear the voice of every household member.  This isn’t the closing credits of The Waltons — it’s an outgoing message. Besides, the image of you and your significant others huddling around the phone to record that message — well, it makes me throw up a little in my mouth.   So please, elect a spokesperson.  I’ll understand that he speaks for everyone.
  11. Don’t play music.  Seriously, if I want to know what’s on your iPod playlist, I’ll go to your blog.
  12. Don’t tell me to "have a nice day".  You don’t mean it, because for all you know, I’m calling to sell magazines or get you to switch to AT&T long distance.  It’s nice that you want to be nice to me — but being cheerful to everybody without knowing their identity doesn’t make you a "good person"; it makes you Forrest Gump.

This guy is right: short and sweet.  Say your (full) name, your phone number (just to be sure I got it right) and get off.  And if you have one of those answering machines or voicemail services that require fifteen seconds of dead air before it offers the beep, get a new one.

Dispatch From The Front Lines Of The War On Christmas

Ken AshfordGodstuffLeave a Comment

Well, the wingers were all pissed at Lowe’s Hardware this week. 

Apparently, the Lowes catalogue features "family trees" instead of "Christmas trees" in their latest catalogue.

Familytrees

Now, I was going to knock off a couple of points against Lowe’s here.  On its face, this was clearly a rather stupid decision.  I’d like to have a drink with the PR guy who thought to himself, "Well, we don’t want to offend any Jews or Muslims or Kwanzans by promoting Christmas trees.  Let’s call them . . . family trees."  Seriously, dude.  Get a grip.  Nobody is going to be offended by Lowe’s selling Christmas trees.

On the other hand, the over-the-top outrage from the Christian right is just as silly:

But is it the sort of thing that we want America to be? Do we want to cast aside our entire history, our traditions and ideals just to avoid a lawsuit instituted by a tiny but loud minority? When do we stand up and say "enough is enough"? When do we find politicians with the guts to pass tort reform legislation? When do we find politicians who will appoint judges who are interested in the law as opposed to activism and getting themselves in the newspapers? How long are we to put up with this nonsense? How long do we turn our faces away while people with ideas antithetical to America run rampant throughout our courts and halls of government?

As I was trying to digest all this, I came across this offering from Lowe’s: the "Holiday Living 7.5′ Pre-lit Switchit Cashmere Hard Needle Bavarian Fir tree".  According to the description, the "tree can be displayed in a traditional format or in an inverted upside down format".  You know, like this….

719046974403

And then suddenly it dawned on me.

Lowe’s isn’t being silly — it’s being smart.  It’s getting free publicity for its trees by provoking the religious right. 

It goes like this:

  1. Promote "Christmas trees" as "family trees".
  2. This will be deemed offensive to groups like the American Family Association, but not too offensive.  (After all, how loudly can the American Family Assocation complain about "family trees"?  It’s not like they’re being called "atheist trees")
  3. Throw in an ambiguous-meaning upside-down "family tree" and the Christian right gets in a predictable uproar, and puts out action calls to its members, almost always linking to your site.
  4. Make nice-nice with the Christian right, claim it was an "error", and point out that you refer to "trees as Christmas trees in this season’s television and magazine ads and in its advertising flyers".
  5. Free publicity = profit!

Not too shabby a business model.

So, with the Lowe’s campaign come and gone, the wingnuts have now targeted Petsmart.  The particular objections here elude me.  According to the AFA press release (emphasis in original):

A search on PetSmart’s home page found 252 references to "holiday." It also found 43 references to "Christmas." But, alas, this is very misleading. When you click on "Christmas" you are directed to a page containing the same gifts you get when you search for holiday. Of all the items that pop up when you search for Christmas, not a single one mentions Christmas or is identified as being a Christmas gift.

At PetSmart, everything is "holiday."

Now, the gifts they are objecting to are things like a Santa-themed pet carrier and a Santa Plush Toy for your dog.  Excuse me, but wasn’t there a time when the Christian right complained that "Christmas" was so commercialized that it lacked perspective on Christ …and too much emphasis on Santa?  Apparently, those days are gone, because now they’re complaining that descriptions of Santa dog toys(!) don’t reflect enough Christ-i-ness. Go figure.

And that’s the state of play in the War on Christmas.  And it’s not even Thankgiving yet.

UPDATE:  Liberty Counsel’s "Naughty or Nice" list just got released (PDF format)

Here’s the "naughty":

Ace Hardware – "Holiday Decorations" section on their web site. Christmas Trees are referred to as "Trees." Only mention of Christmas is "Christmas lights" and "Christmas Holders."

Banana Republic – Web site: "Kick off the party season in style," "Holiday Gift Guide." No mention of Christmas.

Best Buy – Web site: "Gift Center: This season shop with confidence knowing your holiday will be: Wow Guaranteed," "Great savings… for the Holidays." Gift cards: "Happy Holidays" "Happy Kwanza" "Happy Hanukkah" and "Merry Christmas." No real celebration of Christmas.

Bloomingdale’s – Web site: "Gifted 2007," one "Christmas" ornament, one Christmas makeup kit, no celebration of Christmas made evident, no Christmas e-card or gift card, but there is a Hanukkah e-card.

Circuit City – Web site: "Holiday Gift Guide," "Free shipping by December 24th," "Guaranteeing all orders to arrive by Christmas day if…" Only mention of Christmas is in the shipping fine print.

Dick’s Sporting Goods – Web site: "The Gift Center." No mention of Christmas.

Ebay – "Give Santa a run for his money." No mention of Christmas.

Food Lion – Web site: "Make Family Time a Holiday Favorite" and "Get the latest on what’s new or in season." No mention of Christmas.

Gap – Web site: "For the Season." "Holiday Doggie Pajamas," "Sweet Holiday Dreams Long Sleep Set," "Holiday Graphic Bodysuit," "Holiday Letters Bodysuit." No mention of Christmas.

Giant Eagle Pharmacy – Mentions "holiday," "holiday cards," "Festive Seasonal Boxed Cards," and the slogan "Reach for the Stars this Holiday Season" on the web site. No mention of Christmas.

Hollister Co – Web site: "SoCal X-Mas" video, "Holiday Beach" video. No mention of Christmas.

Home Depot – "Holiday Gift Center," "Holiday Decorations," "Home for the Holidays," "Artificial Trees," not Christmas trees. No mention of Christmas.

ICE.com – "Gifts From the Heart," "This Holiday Give a Gift… to the special people in your life…" No mention of Christmas.

J. Crew Outfitters – Web site: "Holiday Look" "Highland Holiday," "The Very Merry Gift Shop," and "We’re Going Home for the Holidays."

K-Mart – Web site: "Holiday Shop," "Holiday Toys," "Get it in time for the Holiday," "Holiday Planner." They are selling "Christmas Decorations" and "Christmas Trees," but they are calling Christmas "The Holiday." *Local store has large ornaments hanging from ceiling that say "Merry Christmas."

Kohl’s – "Holiday shopping list," no Christmas trees – just Trees, "Hanukkah" section, "Holiday: find the perfect gifts," "45 days left – shipping deadlines," "stocking stuffers," "St. Nicholas station" and "Nativity" section, but never mentions "Christmas."

Land’s End – Web site: "Holiday Gift Shop," "Holiday Stockings," "Holiday Gift Sacks." No mention of "Christmas."

Lane Bryant – "Holiday HQ," "Gift Guide," "For a truly special holiday gift…" "Holiday Season," "Holiday Looks," and "Holiday Style" on the web site. No mention of Christmas.

Marshalls – Front Page of the web site: "Who Wants a Holiday That Looks Like Everyone Elses?" "Holiday Style," and "Holiday Decorating Ideas." No mention of Christmas.

Nordstrom – Web site: "Once Upon a Holiday… gifts were given," "Great Gifting." No mention of Christmas.

Office Max – Web site: "Great Gifts for the Holiday," "Snappy Holiday Gift Ideas," "Furnish your office in time for the holidays," and "Everything you need this holiday season and beyond." No mention of Christmas.

Old Navy – "Holiday Favorites," "Holiday Morning," "Season in Style," and "Holiday Gift Guide" sections on the web site. No mention of Christmas.

Pet Smart – Web site: "Holiday Central," "Photos with Santa Claws," "Holiday Games," "Holiday Wrapping Paper," and "Holiday Shops." No mention of Christmas.

Sprint – Web site: "Tis the season to give SprintSpeed," "Holiday Entertainment," "Holiday Season," and "Sprint lights up the Holidays." No mention of Christmas.

TPM’S Highlight Reel Of Last Night’s Debate

Ken AshfordElection 2008Leave a Comment

A shortish video:

My problem with debates, particularly at this stage in the game, is that the media tries to make them all about "gotchas" and "one-liners".  There was a time when the media used to look down on that kind of thing; now their questions to the candidates encourage that.  Sure, a debate about differences in policy issues is boring as all hell, but it’s important.  The whole horserace/cage match thing is totally irrelevant ("Will Obama slap down Hillary in tonight’s debate?  WATCH on CNN… TONIGHT!")

[Case in point: CNN now covers the debate with the "top 10 zingers"]

In short, better media please.

MORE THOUGHTS from Brian Beutler:

I should say that I don’t think the fault for the awfulness of the debates rests entirely on the journalists. Politicians are pretty good at not saying anything no matter what the questions are and no matter who asks them. I suppose the ideal forum might look something like a town-hall where audience members ask questions and professional journalists filibuster whenever the politicians try to dodge. But that would screw up this system we have which encourages famous journalists, asking predictable questions, to appear dozens of times before famous politicians, trying desperately to pivot to their stump speeches, all in an effort to create as many tabloid-like headlines as possible.

Yup, I’ll agree with that.

UPDATE:  Yglesius agrees with my complaint (emphasis mine):

As ever, it’s really striking to observe the difference between the audience-generated questions and the journalist-generated questions. Wolf Blitzer’s main interest is in asking questions designed to put Democrats on the wrong side of public opinion, even if those questions are about things like driver’s licenses or "merit pay" for teachers that aren’t really under federal purview. Efforts to reframe those questions by putting those topics in the larger context of immigration policy more generally or education more generally are derided as cowardly dodges. The point, after all, is to force a choice — piss off an interest group, or say something that could be used in a GOP attack ad.

The real people, by contrast, ask about problems in their lives. The mother of an individual ready reserve member wants to know about Iran policy. The mother of an active duty soldier wants to know about military pay versus pay for military contractors. An Arab-American wants to know about racial profiling. Then the candidates explain what they think about these issues.

The voters are curious and want to learn where the candidates stand. Blitzer doesn’t care about informing the public about the issues — he actually objects when candidates try to explain their views on broad immigration policy issues — he’s just interested in trying to embarrass the candidates.

UPDATE: Great example. An audience member makes the sensible observation that the candidates haven’t talked about the Supreme Court and asks them to say something about their approach to picking nominees. I’d be interested to hear the answers to these questions. The journalists decide to change this isn’t a pointed question about a Roe litmus test — gotcha! — do Democrats violate the "no litmus test" taboo, or do they piss off feminists? Good work! Blah.

UPDATE:  The last question was an embarrasing one from a UNLV student to Hillary — whether she preferred diamonds or pearls.  The questioner — a UNLV student — was heavily criticized after the debate for her stupid question.  It turns out, it wasn’t the question she wanted to ask.  Once again, CNN trivialized substance.

Million March For God

Ken AshfordGodstuff2 Comments

It’s scheduled for October 11, 2008, in Washington, DC (really, would you hold a "million march" anywhere else?) so mark your calandars.

It looks like it’s the pipe dream of two guys who don’t have much experience in this kind of thing.  One of them, Joel Cody, has "been involved" with organizations such as the Pan-African Society and Guardian Angels. He has also "promoted the Million Man and Woman marches" and "proposed tougher legislation for firearms", so you know he’s the right guy to organize this.

But perhaps I am being too harsh.  After all, they have an impressive list of supporters (several trees) and an equally impressive list of backers (wispy clouds).

So what’s going to happen at this shindig?  Well, pretty much what you would expect.  A million people marching for God.  And gospel artists (they hope).  And also, for some reason, a lot of talk about health care, specifically stuff like this:

So who will control these doctors?  How about God?  If they are true men of God, and they take their Oath to heart, thou shall not harm, then we should be able to trust them.  But, even if they are not men of God, this does not make them bad doctors, it will come down to individual choices. 

We do not believe that Western Medicine has all the answers. People should be free to make choices outside of conventional Western Medicine and not suffer not being able to do so.  Prayer holds a lot of healing.  Herbs have been proven effective for centuries, well beyond modern day medicine and synthetic drugs.  In fact, look at all the side effects of any synthetic drug.  Are there alternatives that doctors are NOT allowed to use?  You bet.
Ummm.  Okay.
I think they’re also going to lose a lot of people with this sentiment:
I hope to offend the press, Big government, Big Business, Big Establsihed Religions and everyone in between.
I guess he’s saying that this "Million March 4 God" is for 4 fringe religions only.
Some other sentiments expressed by the organizers of the march:
"God created the 7 races.." [Hmmm.  I wasn’t aware there were seven…]
"And before another argument breaks out, God is both male and female, and yet neither at the same time."
But the prize has to go to the poster for the event…Millionmarchforgodborder
…with the attractive image not unlike a man defecating on the Capital steps.  Come on, guys.  Where are your PR graphics people?
UPDATE:  Joel Cody himself responds in the comments.

In Which I Browbeat One Of My Favorite People

Ken AshfordRandom Musings1 Comment

Seriously, Em?  133 words in the first half of the month?

UPDATE:  Emily responds:

First of all, I happen to be up to nine hundred words now. Second, the prize isn’t the completion, it’s the journey. Third, just because you got overlooked by People Magazine again this year doesn’t mean you need to take it out on poor starving novel writers like me.
So there.

Ouch.  This is why I never cross Emily. 

Also, she does write good well.

Not The Word I Would Use

Ken AshfordRandom MusingsLeave a Comment

From California:

Deborah Thompson told authorities afterward that she drank a bottle of whiskey before she wandered to the railroad tracks and tried to wave the train to a stop. When asked why, she told Yuba County sheriff’s deputies she was just being silly.

"Silly".  Hmmm…

Instead, the train hit her and knocked her 20 to 30 yards.

Thompson suffered head injuries and a fractured thigh bone but was conscious and talking after the accident.

Pop-Song Correspondences

Ken AshfordPopular CultureLeave a Comment

From John Moe at McSweeney

A Letter to Elvis Presley From His Hound Dog

Hound20dog20singleDear Elvis,

You dick.

You’ve put me in a no-win situation and I’m more than a little bit upset about it. You treat me like crap, you insult me, but yet I am, unavoidably, a hound dog and thus have no choice but to love you with blind and eternal devotion. And while that is my physiological imperative, it’s not my choice. I give you loyalty and affection, I prostrate myself before you, but, as I understand the whole man-dog dynamic, you’re supposed to love me too. I’m supposed to be your best friend. But instead, you publicly announce that I’m no friend of yours. You sing it at the top of your lungs. While shaking your ass. This relationship is broken, Elvis, and it’s up to you to fix it.

I admit it: I do cry all the time. I think a doctor would call it severe clinical depression, if you ever took me to a doctor, like a responsible owner would. I wake up in the morning and there’s this massive cloud of despair hanging over me….

An Invitation to Joni Mitchell to Sing at the Opening of the Tree Museum

Penmus3Dear Joni,

I’m writing to you amid sounds made by carpenters, drywall installers, painters, and a bunch of other people all gearing up for the opening night of the long-anticipated Tree Museum. The nice thing is that, with all these trees, the sounds are muffled. I’ll get right to the point: We need your help. I would like to invite you to perform at our opening-night gala.

As you may know, our path to opening the Tree Museum has not been an easy one. First, we had to dig up all the trees, necessitating the hiring of shovelers the world over. Then we had to transport those trees and actually put them in the Tree Museum, which brought to light what was clearly a massive design flaw. The trees were so large (redwoods, some of them) that they could barely fit through the front door, and they were so long that the ends of them were sometimes poking out both sides of the building. Making matters worse, the ceiling of the Tree Museum was only maybe 60 feet high….

We’re also hoping that our other developments can offset some of the cost. A few years ago, when we first acquired the land that would become our Paradise Development Project, it was a complete mess. Rabbits and deer running all over the place. A meadow. A babbling brook. Goddamn rainbows everywhere. The neighbors referred to it as Paradise, but if it was so great, why couldn’t you drive on it anywhere? Can it really be paradise when you have to walk across a damn meadow while kindly forest creatures constantly nuzzle you?

We took care of that and paved the crap out of the thing. On that land now stands the very popular Pink Hotel. We still see rabbits once in a while, but that’s what the leg traps and acid vats are for….

A Letter to Elton John From the Office of the NASA Administrator

Elton_johnDear Mr. John,

This letter is to inform you of your termination from the NASA astronaut program. Our decision comes after a great deal of deliberation, and while we take no pleasure in terminating you, we felt it was the only choice we had.

Your offenses have been many. To begin with, we had hoped that after all the hundreds of hours of training you received, you would understand the measures in place to prepare a crew for a launch. So when you showed up, preflight, with a bag packed by your wife, that rubbed a lot of people the wrong way. Jewelry? Oversize sunglasses? Sandwiches? On a rocket flight? That’s poor judgment, Mr. John. I don’t know if that’s the way it’s done in the rocky-roll world that you’re used to, but at NASA we don’t pack our own luggage.

You should also know that many on the ground crew mentioned that at zero hour (9 a.m.) you seemed to be intoxicated, possibly "high," as the hippies say. At the time, I thought that to be a baseless accusation and, since we had a mission to launch, I disregarded it. But the transmissions you made once the craft had entered its orbit made me wonder. Over and over we would ask for your readings on the effects of weightlessness, the craft’s condition, and the status of the numerous scientific experiments onboard, but instead of giving us that information, you moped about missing the Earth and missing your wife and being lonely in space. Well, goddamn it, Mr. John, you knew what you were getting yourself into up there! It’s not like riding on a rocky-roll tour bus! Of course it’s lonely! It’s space! Do you realize there are millions of people who’d give anything to be up there? It’s a chance of a lifetime! And you’re crying like a damn baby! …

A Retort to Carly Simon Regarding Her Charges of Vanity:

Ans3Dear Carly,

Nice song. Wow, you really stuck it to me, eh? Yes, ma’am.

Jesus, you are one bitter woman, Carly Simon.

Listen, I’m pretty busy right now with high-profile meetings and social engagements, but there were things I simply could not let stand.

First of all, that party took place on a yacht. So the way I walked in was perfectly appropriate. In fact, there is a certain way that one is expected to conduct oneself in such a situation. I could explain but I doubt you’re interested. As for the apricot scarf and the tilted hat, again, perfectly appropriate for a maritime soiree. Look it up. I’m sorry you had a problem with that. Funny, there were plenty of girls that night who certainly had no quarrel.

Secondly, yes, I went up to Saratoga for an important horserace. And yes, my horse won, thanks to years of training and the hard work of all the people involved. Is this a bad thing? And yes, I did take the jet to Nova Scotia. I would do it again in an instant. Have you ever seen the total eclipse of the sun, Carly? It’s one of the most amazing natural phenomena one could witness….

I’ve presented here mere snippets.  There are more:

Attention, Mr. Axl Rose: We Did Not Feel Welcome in the Jungle

A Letter Between Siblings Who Lived in the House Described in "Our House" by Madness

A Note Placed in the Pay Envelope of Billy "the Piano Man" Joel

Concerning Jon Bon Jovi, Wanted Dead or Alive

A Bridge Tournament Too Far

Ken AshfordBush & Co.1 Comment

At the World Bridge Championship last month held in Shanghai, a team of women who represented the United States won the Venice Cup Award, and made a little protest at the awards dinner.

Here’s the picture —

Bridgespan

There was no Dixie Chicks-like speech or anything like that.  Just a crude hand-drawn sign on the back of a menu saying "We did not vote for Bush".  It was a "spur-of-the-moment" thing they did.

As a result, the four women face sanctions from the United States Bridge Federation, consisting of one year’s suspension (which will include non-participation at the the World Bridge Olympiad next year in Beijing); a one-year probation after that suspension; 200 hours of community service “that furthers the interests of organized bridge”; and an apology drafted by the federation’s lawyer.

And:

It would also require them to write a statement telling “who broached the idea of displaying the sign, when the idea was adopted, etc.”

You know, name names.  That may be moot, however, since somone has fessed up, according to CBS:

Gain Greenberg, the team’s nonplaying captain, said she decided to put up the sign in response to question from players from other countries about American interrogation techniques, the war in Iraq and other foreign policy issues.

"There was a lot of anti-Bush feeling, questioning of our Iraq policy and about torture," she said. "There wasn’t the amount of warmth you usually feel at these events."

Reasonable enough.  It’s embarrassing to represent this country nowadays, especially abroad.

Is this a First Amendment issue?  Two opposing viewpoints:

“This isn’t a free-speech issue,” said Jan Martel, president of the United States Bridge Federation, the nonprofit group that selects teams for international tournaments. “There isn’t any question that private organizations can control the speech of people who represent them.”

Not so, said Danny Kleinman, a professional bridge player, teacher and columnist. “If the U.S.B.F. wants to impose conditions of membership that involve curtailment of free speech, then it cannot claim to represent our country in international competition,” he said by e-mail.

I tend to agree with the view that this is not a First Amendment issue.  The USBF is not the federal government.

I do, however, disagree with this, from the website of the USBF (emphasis mine):

The VCW ["Venice Cup Winners"] have in no way acknowledged that the action has created a serious problem for the USBF. They instead have chosen to go on the offensive by extremely aggressive defensive actions, rather than simply acknowledging, “We made a mistake. What can we do to rectify the situation?” In the vast majority of situations a party whose defined role is to represent another party has a fiduciary responsibility to represent the interests of the principal ahead of their own interests. In cases where an agent or other representative acts adversely to the interests of the principal, they may in fact be subject to legal action. Certainly, the principal has no obligation to allow said agents to represent them in the future.

While there is some truth to that, it is countered by the obvious facts, and begs the question:  Does any reasonable person believe the four women were speaking for the United States Bridge Federation when they said "We did not vote for Bush"?

The clear answer is "no".  They were speaking for themselves.

It also seems clear to me that the four women did not violate any rules of the USBF.  You know how you can tell?  Because as a result of this incident, the USBF Board is considering changes to its disciplinary rules to "make certain that an incident like this does not happen again".  Tell tale sign — if you make the rule after the fact, then it clearly wasn’t there before the fact.

The specific grievance they were charged with (yes, I got in the muck a little by going to the original documents) was this:

Actions unbecoming a member of the USBF (or a person participating in a tournament conducted by the USBF), including but not limited to, improper actions at the time and site of a tournament, including parking lots, elevators, restaurants, and hotels.

I suppose reasonable minds kind differ on whether hold a small anti-Bush sign is "unbecoming a member of the USBF", but that’s kind of the point.  The rule is vague, ambiguous and totally arbitrary.

All in all, it was just a sign.  But the venom it has produced is outrageous, and the USBF is going way overboard.  Not overboard, I might add, as the rightwing Bush supporters, who use this incident to point out how ugly the women bridge players are, and how hot the Fox News babes are (seriously, read the comments).

UPDATE:  Everyone seems to be weighing in on this.  Read more at  Captain’s Quarters, Firedoglake, Outside The Beltway, The Newshoggers, Jon Swift, Political Machine, Rox Populi, Hot Air, The Carpetbagger Report, Buck Naked Politics, Gateway Pundit, The Gun Toting Liberal™, Weasel Zippers, The Garlic, Taylor Marsh, TPMCafe blogs, Wonkette, The Sundries Shack, AMERICAblog, Truthdig, Macsmind, Neptunus Lex, The American Street and Sister Toldjah.

Some views from Truthdig:

While there’s something inherently humorous about a brouhaha of this magnitude over a bridge tournament, there’s also something truly appalling about an organization that claims to represent the United States in the eyes of the world seeking retribution over an act of dissent—particularly one that holds the majority opinion.

From the very rightwing Captain’s Quarters:

However, the bridge organization seems to have also overreacted. Rather than scold the players and let them absorb their due obloquy, they have decided to sanction them for their political speech. The sign did not explicitly violate any rule, apparently, but the club will suspend them for conduct unbecoming a member. In doing so, they have transformed these women from immature, sniveling examples of BDS sufferers into First Amendment martyrs.

From satirist Jon Swift (see if you can catch the satire):

The First Amendment does not give people the right to yell anti-Bush slogans in a crowded theater, or even to talk during the movie at all. If we let a few lady Bridge players criticize the President, it could spread. The next thing you know Democrats in Congress will start opposing the President’s appointments, passing laws against torture or defying him on funding for the Iraq War.

And predictions from Pure Garlic:

Strap yourselves in for an onslaught of jingoistic, patriotic morals lessons, and a parade of "bridge experts" on the cable news frontier, pontificating on how this is degrading and ruining the game of Bridge – and the country.

And Mark Kleiman:

If you exercise your right to free speech, you’re unfit to represent the United States in international competition. Why is that so hard to understand?

The Creation Museum

Ken AshfordEducation, GodstuffLeave a Comment

A review:

Imagine, if you will, a load of horseshit. And we’re not talking just your average load of horseshit; no, we’re talking colossal load of horsehit. An epic load of horseshit. The kind of load of horseshit that has accreted over decades and has developed its own sort of ecosystem, from the flyblown chunks at the perimeter, down into the heated and decomposing center, generating explosive levels of methane as bacteria feast merrily on vintage, liquified crap. This is a Herculean load of horseshit, friends, the likes of which has not been seen since the days of Augeas.

And you look at it and you say, “Wow, what a load of horseshit.”

But then there’s this guy. And this guy loves this load of horseshit. Why? Well, really, who knows? What possesses someone to love a load of horseshit? It’s beyond your understanding and possibly you don’t actually want to know, even if you could know; maybe it’s one of those “on that path lies madness” things. But love it he does, and he’s not the only one; the admiration for this particular load of horseshit exists, unaccountably, far and wide. There are advocates for this load of horseshit.

And so this guy who loves this load of horseshit decides that he’s going to do something; he’s going to give it a home. And not just any home, because as this is no ordinary load of horseshit, so must its home be no ordinary repository for horseshit. And so the fellow builds a temple for his load of horseshit. The finest architects scope this temple’s dimensions; the most excellent builders hoist columns around the load of horseshit and cap them with a cunning and elegant dome; and every surface of the temple is clad in fine-grained Italian marble by the most competent masons in a three-state radius. The load of horseshit is surrounded by comfortable seats, the better for people to gaze upon it; docents are hired to expertly describe its history and features; multimedia events are designed to explain its superior nature, relative not only to other loads of horseshit which may compete in loadosity or horseshittery, but to other, completely unrelated things which may or may not be loads of anything, much less loads of horseshit.

The guy who built the temple, satisfied that it truly represents his beloved load of horseshit in the best possible light, then opens the temple to the public, to attract not only the already-established horseshit enthusiasts, but possibly to entice new people to come and gaze on the horseshit, and to, well, who knows, admire its moundyness, or the way it piles just so, to nod in appreciation of the rationalizations for its excellence or to clap in delight and take pictures when an escaping swell of methane causes the load of horseshit to sigh a moist and pungent sigh.

When all of this is done, the fellow turns to you and asks you what you think of it all now, now that this gorgeous edifice has been raised in glory and the masses cluster in celebration.

And you say, “Well, that’s all very nice. But it’s still just an enormous load of horseshit.”

And this is, in sum, the Creation Museum.

Believe it or not, the reviewer is only just getting started….