Finally finally finally, even Jonah Goldberg stops drinking the Kool-Aid.  He admits that the Iraq War was a mistake.  But his cognitive dissonance is such that he still can’t admit that people who opposed war all along were right.  Watch this worm squirm:

The Iraq war was a mistake.

I know, I know. But I’ve never said it before. And I don’t enjoy saying it now. I’m sure that to the antiwar crowd this is too little, too late, and that’s fine because I’m not joining their ranks anyway.

…I must confess that one of the things that made me reluctant to conclude that the Iraq war was a mistake was my general distaste for the shabbiness of the arguments on the antiwar side.

Jonah didn’t support the war because of logic or facts.  He supported it because its his knee-jerk reaction to oppose whatever them libruls say.

Wanker.

Susie’s take:

Shorter Jonah Goldberg: If I admit we were wrong about the war, that makes me right about everything else.

Drum also takes Goldberg to task:

But Jonah says that even though it was mistake to go in, we still need to see it through. And then there’s this:

According to the conventional script, if I’m not saying "bug out" of Iraq, I’m supposed to….

To my surprise, the rest of the paragraph is a suggestion that we should hold a plebiscite asking Iraqis if they want us to stay. But that’s not at all what the conventional script requires. The conventional script requires that those who think we should stay need to suggest a way in which we can win. Otherwise Jonah will be writing this same column in 2009, except this time it will be, "If we had known then what we know now, we would have been better off pulling out when we could."

Well, we do know now what we know now. The civil war in Iraq is getting worse, our current strategy plainly isn’t working, there are no more troops to send over, the political situation in Baghdad is untenable, and the U.S. Army is still culturally allergic to counterinsurgency and security training ("Everyone in the U.S. armed forces knows that the way to the top is to command American units, not to advise foreign units," says Max Boot, and he’s right).

Basically, that’s what Goldberg is saying: "All right, all RIGHT!  I was WRONG about Iraq!  I ADMIT it!  So that means I must be right about STAYING in Iraq to clean up the mess we made."

She hasn’t written in a while.  But sheee’s baaaack.

Eschewing capital letters and grammar, Kaye Grogan writes an almost indecipherable piece called "Window of opportunity? . . .quick close it!".  Let’s check it out and see what Kaye is blustering about today:

Are you getting mired down from the annoying propaganda of the political analysts who think they have a cutting edge on reading the minds of the voters as they project who is going to win the House and Senate in November?

A cutting edge on the minds of voters?  I don’t know what that means.  I think we need to start a Kaye Grogan bizarre metaphor count.  So we’re at one.

Well, don’t be fooled by their crystal balls — they don’t know diddly-squat!

Yes.  They don’t use polls, they use crystal balls.

Now all it takes is a little common sense to figure out that neither party should have the cutting edge — much less the Democrats, when it comes to reelection.

Again, I don’t know what Kaye means here by "cutting edge".  Apparently, she’s not using it in the normal way — i.e., the "cutting edge" of technology.  Apparently, it means "lead".  Although I don’t know why common sense should tell us that neither party has the lead — obviously, ONE party probably does.  Kaye Grogan bizarre metaphor count: 2.

If you have followed the trail of the special interest groups who control the Democrats, you should know by now the country would be in a nationwide "state of emergency" dilemma if the Dems are returned to power.

"Followed the trail".  Hmmmm.  Kaye Grogan bizarre metaphor count: 3.

When a potential voter observes the vulturous attitude of Nancy Pelosi waiting in the wings to be "Speaker of the House" this should be more than enough of an incentive to register your pets, pay a special visit to the dearly departed encouraging them to rise up and go to the polls long enough to vote — to defeat Pelosi’s chances of cracking her whip in the house.

Kaye is advocating commiting voter fraud in order to keep the Democrats from taking over the House.  And Kaye, it’s House with a capital H.  And WHIP doesn’t mean, you know, whip.

Nancy Pelosi and Hillary Clinton have more than one thing in common, but their main objective is securing a place in the history books as the first woman president and Speaker of the House.

Step One: They have to go into that machine that Jeff Goldblum used in "The Fly", and become a singular being (like Jeff Goldblulm and the fly).   You know — combine their DNA.

And with either one holding one of these positions would be catastrophic for the country.

Worse than Katrina or 9/11.

After observing the voting records of the "extremist" leftist Democrats — they could never be defined as the lesser of two evils — considering they are the total package when it comes to the axis of evil.

Kaye Grogan bizarre metaphor count: 4,5 and 6.  What is she talking about?  The leftist Democrats are the lesser of two evils (what are the "two"?) and are the total package when it comes to N. Korea, Iran, and Iraq?

This is one area the Dems have bragging rights to and they don’t have to worry that anybody else is going to steal their thunder.

What is one area? And "steal their thunder" brings us  Kaye Grogan bizarre metaphor count: 7.

If the Democrats had been in power since 2001 after the 9/11 attack — the United States would probably have been wiped off of the map by now.

Probably.  Because al Qaeda is that powerful.

I would feel about as secure as a mountain climber one strand away from my rope breaking peering down about 4,000 feet to the bottom — if they were in control. I can’t think of one single Democrat I would trust to oversee the safety of this country against our enemies.

Does the rope peer down 4,000 feet to the bottom?  Or does the climber break?  Kaye Grogan bizarre metaphor count: 8.

Waving the white flag in Iraq and raising taxes is the only wobbly platform the Democrats are running on.

Actually that sounds like TWO platforms.   Kaye Grogan bizarre metaphor count: 9.

And oh yes!. . .they are wearing those old tinseled halos as if their party is completely void of misconduct of any kind.

Which is why voting Republican is better.  Because they DON’T wear halos.  Or something.

And although the Republicans seem to be sitting around biting their fingernails not knowing how to use their power — expecting the American people to forget about how they have taken on the role of scarecrows, the alternative of returning Democrats back to power should be enough to scare the pants off of a bronze statue!

Scarecrows?  Pants on statutes?  Kaye Grogan bizarre metaphor count: 10, 11.  Kaye, are you feeling alright?

With both parties in the "dog house" over the ever growing illegal immigration problem — not even holding one’s nose while voting is going to suffice for the mess our leaders have gotten us into after taking an oath to defend our country against the invasion of our enemies.

I guess the dog pooped in the "dog house" which is why we have to hold our nose.  Kaye Grogan bizarre metaphor count: 12, 13.

Surely out of 300 million people there are better candidates to run for congressional seats. Choosing between the devil and the devil’s right-hand man leaves the voters wishing for other alternatives that just don’t seem to exist.

Hey! We almost understood that part.

There are other alternatives for voters, but it takes adventurous people who are not afraid to demand a change and then follow through to perpetuate the change.

It takes courage to write-in a candidate’s name.

The voters need to realize that even if the window of opportunity appears to be closed — there are other windows in the next room.

Sigh.  Kaye Grogan bizarre metaphor count: 14.

If the window of opportunity keeps opening for the Democrats to regain power — for gosh sakes — slam it shut!

Kaye Grogan bizarre metaphor count: 15.

We need Democrats in power about as much as we need a 4-6 year migraine.

Kaye Grogan bizarre metaphor count: 16.  And we think we know why Kaye is so ornery lately.  Try some Tylenol, dear.